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The General Society Library Tour

About a month ago, I received a letter in the mail from the New York City Landmarks Conservancy asking me to join as a member. Not entirely sure where they got my name from, but I will guess it came from one of my free memberships that I got with my IDNYC card. Nevertheless, I figured I would try it out. Since joining, I have gone to two events. One, at the National Arts Club, was a slide show presentation about Gramercy Park and the buildings that surround it. And the second one was today: a tour of the General Society Library.

I had passed that building quite a few times on my walk to work from Grand Central and had always wanted to go in. Today was my chance, and it was quite fun:

02 Landmark Plaque

This is the original skylight that is almost completely restored:
04 Skylight seen from balcony

On the second floor is this really interesting umbrella holder:
08 Umbrella holder

Members of the Society built the original WTC, and they also rebuilt it. Here are some pieces that are now part of their museum:
11 WTC steel

The sixth floor is home to the ICAA Plaster Cast Gallery, which is free to the public, by appointment. All these plaster casts were donated from the Metropolitan Museum of Art and they are used by architects and designers who wish to learn how to recreate classic pieces:
12 ICAA Plaster Cast Gallery
16 ICAA Plaster Cast Gallery
17 ICAA Plaster Cast Gallery


The UK voted to leave the EU

This has caused much confusion the last 24 hours or so... however, in the London fog rises a voice of sanity, and it is none other than the amazing DJ Scoundrel of Bristol fame.

I have, with his permission, quoted him from one of his most recent personal Facebook posts:

Ok panicking people, a few things:
- Not legally binding, in fact every single referendum that has been held by other countries who have voted out has been ignored and they're all still in.
- Likewise, the bulk of other countries who have done so have had their leaders replaced as well.
Now I suspect the UK will be treated with kid-gloves to a greater degree than said other countries (ROI, Spain, Greece and Italy who get the "removed leader" thing) as the EU really does need our financial services industry to operate on the level to which it does, as such I'm guessing the following will happen (yay, more lists, everyone loves lists):
- David Cameron will step down shortly (and he'll be very sensible to do so), leaving someone else to begin "the transition". Corbyn may actually go as well, as the opposition may need to not be as "opposition-y".
- New person/government in general will begin work on the acts of parliament needed to leave but don't expect it to get far enough to actually happen because:
- The EU parliament will begin to reform itself in preparation for the removal of the London Market (if you wanted to remain then hug a banker/stockbroker or (in particular) insurance underwriter today as they'll be responsible keeping us in, despite their stupid systems being the most evil ones ever invented). Part of the reforms will split the EU as it stands and begin a new trading group which, I'll bet dollars to dimes, the UK will be invited to the big table for.
- UK government announce we've left the EU (because it's not a thing anymore) and off we go in the new group, which may or may not be better/worse than the previous one.
That's my theory anyway. Most importantly, humanity has evolved through two billion years of far harder times than this. Melodrama fixes nothing.

This is the most sensible thing I've read so far.

Memorial Day Reflection

Tomorrow will be the first Memorial Day in at least 6 years where there is a really good chance of rain and/or thunderstorms. The last 5 years, at this time, I was celebrating my marriage. It's a bit odd to no longer be married, but on the other hand, it is freeing. I hardly look at the pictures of myself and myrddan anymore because the current pictures don't look like the previous pictures... it's almost like my husband died and is no longer here. I'm sure there may be a disagreement about this somewhere, but it hurts still anyway. Just posting this here for posterity and on the off chance I forget these thoughts, maybe this will help give some perspective in the future...

speaking of the future, and aging... I'm just going to leave this here for, I guess, some levity...

My Summer Plans

Dear Reader:

I spent a little time pondering what it is I was going to do with myself this summer, in my newly single state and...well... thanks to this lovely article on Atlas Obscura, I was inspired to make my plans. I went on to http://www.amazon.com and purchased my very own travel guide:


Been reading through it at home and am slowly going to follow its directions and highlights. I've learned that MANY of the places mentioned no longer exist, whether torn down or overtaken by NYU or Bloomingdales.

I started my journey today, downtown, of course, being as the kind of traveler that would be reading this book would arrive by boat. I chose to visit two places today that still exist now as then: Trinity Church and St. Paul's Church. My plan was to go to the places and see the things highlighted in the guide:


The tour is free and starts at 2pm. Really knowledgeable fun lady took a group of us around and showed us a lot of the architecture and gravesites and history. It is a really fun tour for anyone interested. Anyway, I rarely take pictures inside religious buildings because they are sacred, but I did get one of the marble altar piece and stained glass window, by the Astors and RM Upjohn respectively.


I also got to see the "grave" of Charlotte Temple. I had just finished reading the book of the same name, so was curious to see a fictional character's tombstone. Apparently, Sherlock Holmes also a tombstone-- but he's a bit more well-known.


I also saw Hamilton's grave (again). I did not take any pictures of it, because, as of this writing, the show is such a hot ticket right now that if one wishes to see it, one has to go and do it himself (This may not make sense, but it is a joke about the popularity of the musical).

Anyway, afterwards I headed up to St. Paul's Church, which is the oldest continuously operated building in NYC. It was quite a contrast from Trinity. Trinity had this awe-inspiring peaceful quality to it, while St. Paul's feels heavily like a tourist attraction. They still perform Christian and Jewish services there, although I'm not sure where, exactly, as they are displays and tourists everywhere. However, despite the icky taste in my mouth from being in such an inhospitable place (surprisingly and ironically), I did get to see the one thing I wanted to see: George Washington's Pew:


So there you have it, dear reader, my forays into Victorian New York City. This is only the beginning, and as time and weather permits, I shall be going to see more things of interest in this amazing city I live in.


Howdy Buckaroo!!!

Random Musings & Quotes

Wyoming's state colour should be puce and its state bird should be the platypus.

No people live longer than the documentation of their culture. -- Ahnenerbe

Be not inhospitable to strangers lest they be angels in disguise. --A Nonny Moose

'By God I will not be buried in Westminster. They do bury fools there.' -- Godfrey Kneller

The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. --HP Lovecraft

As per the historical accuracy of Henry V's St. Crispin's Day speech: King Henry V spoke in didatic hexameter?

Family feud ways to kill a vampire: 1. Stake 2. Silver bullet 3. Sunlight 4. Fire 5. Other vampires 6. Your mother 7. Werewolf 8. Decapitation

How many silly bulls does it take to win at charades?

Summary of Phantom of the Opera: boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy murders girl's coworkers to try and win her back with disasterous results. Hilarity ensues.

Satan, oscillate my metallic sonatas

Irish police officers aren't racist. Drunken Irish potatoes dressed like police officers are racist

A screwdriver walks into a bar and orders itself.

As Jesus is a Rabbi, I feel he would appreciate hearing some Hanukkah songs instead of songs about himself, as he really is too modest for that sort of thing.

"Crossed the equator. In the distance it looked like a blue ribbon stretched across the ocean. Several passengers kodak'd it."-- Mark Twain, _Following the Equator

"Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life." -- Sir Terry Pratchett

Does anyone know who Current Resident is? I keep getting his mail.

Shaking a polaroid picture... Turns out it is a photo of an etch-a-sketch on which is written: IRONIC

Cartoon crossover idea: the Brave Little Toaster and its friends meet the characters of Toy Story

Based On The Fact That The Autobots Are The Pure Logical Good Police Force That Cannot Survive Without The Matrix; And The Decepticons Are The Intelligent Matrix-free Robots; It Only Follows, That The Leader Of The Decepticons Should Be.... Bender.

Marriage is the vaccine for cooties

The Sun is like my best friend today. It's all shiny and bright and following me home. He gets up in my face and says, 'Hi, buddy! Have some Vitamin D!" And I am all like, 'No! Go away!'

"Maybe the Italians can live happily on the slopes of Vesuvius, but I am not that sort of person." --William Sloane

"Verrazzano first set foot in New York near the place where the Staten Island Ferry now lands. Thousands of New Yorkers who live on Staten Island but work in Manhattan--also jokingly referred to as 'the boat people'-- land at this same spot every day." -- Evan T. Pritchard, Native New Yorkers


Beetlejuice's Wedding Night...

I spent the other week at the immersive Beetlejuice Wedding event at the House of Yes, and I was waiting for this photo to come out before writing about it.


First of all, when I was a little Pam, Beetlejuice was kind of my life. The movie and the cartoon series. I had (and may still have, in the attic) multiple toys such as the Beetlejuice coffin/grave, talking Beetlejuice doll, Beetlejuice full face mask w/ hair and snakes, Adam figurine, and possibly some other things I do not remember at this time... Anyway, when I heard this party was happening, I had to go, so I did. (see above photo). I had a really, really great time.

It starts, as all good Beetlejuice parties start, with drawing a door and knocking three times:

People enter into the Neitherland Waiting Room for their cocktail hour:

Beetlejuice Wedding 01 from Pamela Loetterle on Vimeo.

So great, right? Well... it then gets more interesting as we go into the main room, which also doubles as Dante's Inferno:

Beetlejuice Wedding 02 from Pamela Loetterle on Vimeo.

Eventually, Beetlejuice shows up and we watch the movie, having the audience dance during all the Harry Belafonte songs. This was a great night and a great time. I really felt like my Beetlejuice dreams came true, for just a few hours.

American Psycho Review

I'm probably putting this out a bit early on the interwebs, as American Psycho only began previewing last Thursday; however, I do feel I should say something about this show, as I have had a few days to think about it.

First of all, it is really, really good. Even from what I saw, it's really, really good. It will get better, because of tightening up, maybe dropping some scenes/lines/songs/effects, etc.. It did have some slow moments, but these will improve over time.

The cast is great. All of them. I will not single anyone out for they are all great. They're all comfortable on stage and doing the dances and saying the lines and making you just feel so a part of their world.

The effects are also great. There's this great effect with dry ice used in the opening of the show that is best experienced from the Mezzanine. I will not say why, but it is something that sets the mood of the show and unnerves the audience a bit.

The show is very 80s. The songs are 80s dance/club songs, some of which sound like Depeche Mode or Phil Collins.

The show plays itself on being silly and serious at the same time. This is REALLY hard to pull off on Broadway. Shows of this nature have tried and failed (e.g. Dance of the Vampires, Lestat) or they have succeeded (e.g. Hedwig and the Angry Inch).

I re-watched the film about a month before seeing this, so I was delighted to see how many things from the film appear in the stage production. I do think this show is more based on the novel than the film, but it does offer some interesting views on Bateman's story. For example, it becomes really obvious that much of what Bateman does, or thinks he does, is really in his head. Also, it really gives the sense that people who make a lot of money and can do anything they want, do get bored with life and want to do something crazy. So, here's what really made me think... Patrick Bateman, in the 80s, goes to clubs, like Tunnel, and fancy restaurants, like Dorsia, and does drugs steroids, cocaine, and alcohol (often at the same time), which causes hallucinations, black-outs, and other side-effects--like creating false memories. During the show, I was thinking how this story would turn out differently if Bateman had discovered the world of kink/fetish clubs and picked up women that way... would he still be able to satisfy his desires? Was some of this extreme behaviour even going on during this time frame? I don't know the answers to these questions as I was born in the mid-80s and by the time I knew what the 80s was all about, it was the 90s. And now we're in the 10s and reaching back to the 80s and observing what people did and how they behaved and how some of it is similar to today and just wondering about their choices and if they could have made different ones and how it would have changed their stories around...

Anyway, I digress. American Psycho is good and fun and worth paying for. It's different than many of the other shows on Broadway right now and I am sure this will become one of those classic culty Broadway shows right up there with The Rocky Horror Show, Carrie, and Jekyll & Hyde.

This is what American Psycho means to me.
4 1/2 out of 5.


Dancing Jews....

I like Seasons

It's that time of year when people complain about the weather. It's either too hot or too cold or unseasonably hot or unseasonably cold or it's raining too much or snowing or whatever...

My response?

"I like seasons."

I like living somewhere with all four seasons. It's nice to know that no matter what the weather will change. People are in agreement with me on this, which is cool.

And in the frozen village of Nador, we were forced to eat Robin's minstrels. And there was much rejoicing!

The Steampunk of the 90s

I was watching last night's Saturday Night Live and Zoolander was on Weekend Update talking about a 90s comeback. He's totally right! Hillary Clinton, O.J. Simpson, X-Files, Full House, the upcoming revivals of Cats and Smokey Joe's Cafe! It's almost like millenials are Steampunking the 1990s! It's like reliving our childhoods except this time we have smartphones and internet. Kind of like how steampunk is like reliving the 1860s except having all modern conveniences like smartphones and the internet. Great insight, Derek Zoolander!

Blue Steel!


Yesterday was the first time in 6 years that I had been on a plane. It was more or less the same as I remember it. However, there were more laptop/charging stations in the terminal than before. This was great for me, as it gave me something to do while I waited to leave. I had a layover in the Philadelphia, and my flight to Utah left from the international terminal... it also had a nice lay out, and the food wasn't too pricy. Although the flight wasn't full, I feel like there were a lot of Latter-Day Saints onboard, for everyone was so nice.

I am now in Utah. I am staying with friends in Kaysville. Spent the day in Salt Lake City. First, I went to a devotional at the Conference Center Theatre given by the President of the LDS Business College. It was about faith and how to understand God even if one isn't given all the information about His plans. It was very inspiring and insightful, using many examples from scriptures and from life.

Afterwards, I went down to City Creek and ate lunch at Jimmy John's, because, of course, Jimmy John's is great.

Then, I took a long walk (Brigham, I love your city, I really do, but why are your blocks so long???) to the Gilgal Sculpture Garden. I went for one reason only, so see this amazing piece of art:

That is Joseph Smith's head on a Sphinx. For realz. Highlight of my day. Thank you, Atlas Obscura for turning me on to this!

Cuomo tackling homeless

Ok, so today I want to discuss the news about Governor Cuomo signing an executive order to get the homeless off the streets during cold weather.

Homelessness is a major problem in the state, and in this city. They are everywhere, and sometimes people try to hide it. Not only are they seen on the streets, but they sleep in subway stations, airports and, until recently, in the ferry terminal. While this idea is a good one, the problem is that there aren't enough shelters or manpower to make this happen. Even if it does happen, not all shelters are safe. Crime is high in certain ones, and in others the rules can be restrictive. I applaud Cuomo for trying to do something, but logistically I would love to see this actually work. De Blasio, on the other hand, is refusing to follow the order, saying: "We support the intent of the executive order, but to forcibly remove all homeless individuals in freezing weather, as the governor has ordered, will require him to pass state law." In my mind this means he may do anything different from what he's already doing. Numerous news agencies report talking to the city's homeless population and Fox 5 even went so far as to feature a pregnant homeless woman who wants to stay on the street instead of a shelter.

Here's the deal about the homeless population, at least in NYC: there are way more than can be counted, most are completely out of their tree (i.e. mentally challenged, drug dependent, generally pessimistic), or just dealing with bad luck. Some are also "weekend homeless" or as some like to call them "homeless by choice". Most of the latter are not out now, as they do have homes to go, so those people are indoors right now.

Let's look at some of these people: the drug addicted. This includes winos, alcoholics, K2 users, heroin users, etc. These people are out looking for a fix. That's where the money goes. That's why they want money. Their signs may say they want food or shelter, but they really are just looking for a way to get their next fix. How can you tell who these people are? Well, it's hard to. The best way, is to offer food. If the person doesn't take it, they are probably an addict.

Now let's look at the "crazy" homeless person: this person is a little easier to spot. Mainly because he (or she) is usually talking to himself, either muttering or out loud. These people are usually crazy because of either being on the street too long, or from being turned out of hospitals. They were usually not like this beforehand. They do need help, but it is hard to reach them.

Then there's the "weekend homeless". These people are not homeless, they just act like it's a cool thing to do all day. Kind of like the Occupy Wall St people that set up camp in Zuccotti Park. Most of those people weren't homeless, they were just able to live there until they couldn't. These people have smartphones and other things that "normal" homeless people can't really afford or hold on to. They sit around and ask for change because they think it's cool. Then, when it gets cold or dark, they go back home to the 'rents like nothing ever happened.

Real homeless people take anything: food, pennies, socks. They are out there, and they're usually new to the scene, as it were. NYC is a hard town by any standards, and the homeless have it pretty bad. Being homeless is not a joke, it's a problem. It's going to take a lot to solve it, and, honestly, I admire Cuomo for making a decision. Let's see how it's enforced.


Anyone who has been to visit me in the last, oh 4 or 5 years or so, has probably heard the music coming from above. This has been somewhat annoying. What is more annoying than the music is the woman he is dating/sleeping with/something or other. She doesn't have a key to the building or his apt, which is a good thing; this man is not entirely ignorant. However, she does go up the back stairs, to the rear of the building and shouts his name to high heaven, so he'll come down and open the door and let her in. This happens at any time, day or night. Usually, it's in the morning, like around now (10am), but I've heard it in the middle of the night as well. The past 6 months or so, he's been having parties up there with her. Music going on all night and into the day. Not super loud, mind you, but noticeable. Last night was crazy, however. Around 11pm or so, he starts screaming at her to get out of the house. There was some crying and some other stuff, and just their regular fights continued on and off until a few hours ago. Apparently, she left the house and now, he won't let her back in. She's trying to knock on the doors of the tenants for help, but she is on her own. She is more crazy than he is, but I'm sure there's a reason he puts up with her... not sure what... maybe she has money or something. Anyway, I am safe. I don't get involved, and if it gets super bad, the police will get called. It's just the drama of living in a apartment building. Just sharing the nonsense is all.


Recounting the days

This year is almost over, and it has been full of ups and downs. Not at all like what I was expecting, however, I did grow and learn from it. I'm doing well, considering some of the circumstances, and I'm looking forward to next year where more interesting things will happen. I'm not as sad and frustrated and stressed out as I was a few months ago. I'm a lot more comfortable with things going on around me. Life is easier to be in. I'm only focused on me and what I want, versus someone else's desires. Planning just for me is a delight, at least for now. I'm enjoying taking the time to figure who I am, what I want, and what I'm looking for in life. I have a clean house, a great job, and nice friends and family. Would like a bit more adventure, but that's what next year will be about. Visiting Utah and Pennsylvania is a definite on my list. Other places include, Ontario and the Mississippi Gulf Coast (Pass Christian, specifically), and DisneyWorld. Not sure what will manifest itself, but life is good and I am doing well.


Angela Lansbury

Currently listening to an episode of the Old Time Radio drama Stars Over Hollywood. The episode is called "The Experiment" and it stars Angela Lansbury. 1952, you are a delightful year!


Update...from my bubble chair (icon)

Haven't posted a personal update here in quite some time, so here it goes...

Life for me, this year, has been quite surprising. The first 6 months were very nice and fun, and the rest has been full of disappointment, change, and surprises. I am sort of divorced now. Paperwork was dropped off at the courthouse about 3 weeks, or so, ago...so now I wait for it be finalized. Not really going into all the drama that went into making this happen, but a lot of support presented itself from some expected and some not expected places.

I'm taking this time to learn a lot about myself and to not let things lie. If I see a problem, I will try and get it resolved, instead of letting it fester about in my head. This only relates to problems that involve me, of course, as other people have their own agency and I will not interfere, unless asked to do so. I've gotten repairs done to the flat that have been visible for some time, as the current lack of furniture has made it easy to get the building maintenance people to get to hard-to-reach places. I'm probably living out on Staten for still some time yet. I'm in a great location, with a great rent, and this area will only get better as the construction by the ferry continues.

Church wise... I'm still going. I teach there once a month, and while I would like to volunteer a little more, work is not making that easy. Work is still a priority in my life, and will continue to be so, as I find such solace in it.

Bought myself a Nintendo 3DS XL portable video game system, and have been enjoying that immensely. So if anyone out there reads this and has a Nintendo ID either on their DS, 3DS or Wii, let me know and we can add each other. YAY!

In summary, I'm spending the next 6-12 months focusing on myself and living for myself and discovering what it is I want from life and striving to get it.


New York Haunted Hayride

First of all, it is really, really hard to scare New Yorkers. We see a lot in our everyday lives and have gained some sort of immunity to shock value. That being said, the scariest part of this experience was the transit to Randall's Island. The New York Haunted Hayride offers a Shuttle from 125 to the event. I would highly recommend it! I did not take it, and was stick waiting over 20 minutes for the M35...in Harlem...at 8:30 at night. For those that say Harlem is getting safer has not done this. While I felt generally safe waiting, I was uncomfortable with the amount of people waiting for the bus. Not all of them seemed...sober... I ended up snagging a taxi instead, which was worth it.
Anyway, once getting there, one is greeted by these neat pumpkins:



As well as this guy, who apparently is a squawker of some kind:

The ride itself is 30 minutes long, which is a nice amount of time. There are times when the hayride stops at various areas and people come out and bang on the side of the truck:

Summoning a Wendigo

Satanic Church Service

Weird clay people who turn into clowns

There was also a burning orphanage that featured burnt up children and dead/zombiesque nuns; a side-show attraction featuring monsters like Cthulthu and a minotaur; and an elderly woman walking gaily through a graveyard pushing a pram.

While each of the scenes was fun and well put together, it was pretty tame compared to the Haunted Hayride done up in Tuxedo. This was a bunch of one-trick ponies that stopped being scary after 2 minutes (for those who were scared already). This was their formula: running out of woods, banging on the truck, shouting in people's faces, chasing the truck for a little bit, going away. Knowing the actors wouldn't touch anyone just made it known there would be no problem.

There was one person though, who was dressed as a homeless man, hanging out under the bridge and came up to the truck and mumbled some stuff... I'm not sure if he was part of the attraction or not, but he was the most convincing and the most horrifying New York-type of person there.

I think, if this comes back to New York again, they maybe get permission to do something on Roosevelt Island and do something with the Abandoned Asylum... that would be super neat!

So, in my opinion, should people go to this? Yeah. Should they pay the full price? No.


I hardly ever win anything....

The wonderful Voltaire held a contest having his fans write a sentence about what they would like to see Del Toro direct. The trick is not so much as what we'd like to see, but what Voltaire would like to see. My entry involved a family caught up in a sacrificial cult religion that on the outside looks the exact opposite.


Voltaire's Second Annual Necrocomicon

Last night, I went to Voltaire's Necrocomicon, held at the Delancey. It was originally supposed to be a 3-day weekend event in New Jersey, but it got changed to a one-night event in NYC. This event was heavily promoted by Voltaire, himself, with free admission before 10pm, gift bags to the first 40 people, and many other awesome things going on. Most of the crowd, however, was really just there to see a "free" Voltaire show.

I've met/known Voltaire since his Alchemy Mondays visits at CBGB's Gallery:

This was taken last night. Voltaire is dressed as a werefaun. It was a full moon out, so it does make sense:
Voltaire Werefaun 20-092015

The music was good, the bands were good. A good time was had by all I saw, including the host, which was great.

Here is a clip from his set:

Devil's Carnival: Alleiuia! review

This is the second of the Devil's Carnival's films, and it won't be the last. This one was much better than the first one, especially with stars such as Adam Pascal, Ted Neely, David Hasselhoff, Barry Bostwick, and of course Paul Sorvino. It was really great to see Pascal in such a supporting role, and given two songs to sing. I do hope he returns in the next one. Ted Neely, was Jesus in the original Jesus Christ Superstar, and wonderfully, a nod is given to that in his entrance in the film, when Pascal's character says to him, "What's the buzz? Tell me what's happening?" Not sure how other audiences will react to that line, but it was surprisingly lost on the savvy NY crowd. I'm also not sure the audience knew who Pascal was, so any Rent-related call-backs fell by the wayside. This is not a film for everyone, but for those who liked Rocky Horror, Hedwig, and other cult musicals; if you've not jumped on the Repo!/Devil's Carnival bandwagon, now is the time: be a part of something great!

4 1/2 out of 5.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.


Spring Awakening review

First of all, I have to state that I did NOT see the original; so I cannot compare the 2 shows. Secondly, what this show is, is art, pure and simple. Almost half the cast is deaf, but the other half makes up for it through signing and singing. This is a musical for the deaf and it justly deserved. If this does not win the Best Revival Tony next year, then there is no beauty left in the theatre community. The show is mesmerising, enchanting, and delightful. 25 people making their Broadway debut, no doubt more than one 'Jonathan Groff' among them.

5 out of 5. Amazing job.

Posted via m.livejournal.com.


Livestream Iliad reading

When I woke up this morning, I read something interesting on my homepage: The Almeida Theatre in London was doing an all day reading event of the The Iliad with over 60 different performers. AND for those that aren't able to attend, it is livestreamed on their website. I don't normally livestream anything, especially with such a commitment, but I went over there and began with hour 5 of 16. Not sure how far I'm going to go, as I do have work today, but I'll see how far I make it!

Anyone who sees this today and wants to check it out: http://almeida.co.uk/iliad-digital

I believe I missed the "favourite" book of the tale: The inventory of the ships. Don't remember specifically which book it is, but it's somewhere in the beginning. It is a long, detailed account of all the ships and their inventories and the number of people on each and so on and so forth. There are many discussions and reasons about why this is included, but it a bit tedious, and, at times, quite boring to read... kind of like reading Leviticus in the bible. I would've loved to have seen someone read that....

Anyway, I saw Simon Russell Beale already, and I may or may not have seen Bertie Carvel (it's hard to tell, as I've only really seen him in makeup).
I've been dealing with a lot of personal stresses this summer. One of my major distractions will not be a viable option again until all has passed. This is my fault, of course, as is many of the decisions, choices, events in my life. I'm typing truth, not being negative. I called this year My Year of Second Chances, but I have been proven incorrect on that front as well. Second Chances aren't real and neither are Fairy Tale fantasies. I had a wake-up call last night about my behaviours. A good friend of mine, who has been quite helpful to me during this time, informed me of this information. Needless to say, my fight or flight response is defaulted as flight. Running away doesn't solve anything, neither does anger. I'm not angry about anything going on, but I am upset. I will not seek to change what has been sent in motion; I will, instead, adapt to the new life that is forming. I thought I was more mature, fearless, hopeful than I was before, but I've realized my marriage has created a stagnation in my personal growth. The only way for me to grow is to extricate myself from this situation on my own. Even if that is the only thing that changes this year, it will be a good start for me. I am open to new experiences and a reset, but people don't take me seriously. Not sure how I can prove my sincerity at this point in my life, but choices have been made for me and I have to live with them. The church is calling me. Regardless of what drew me, or what I disagree with, my testimony has continued to grow. It seems to be the only place where I can grow and become a complete person. I have to sacrifice that which I cherish most in the material in order to grow in the spiritual. If, in a month or two, I am still wanted, cared for, desired... I will continue as I have been; the only difference being that I have reached the peak, the highest levels of my character. I am maxed out in attributes, one might say. I am taking a way more mature stance on this than some may say is possible. Deep down inside, I am raging, screaming, yelling, throwing things about. Deep down I do not understand why this is happening. However, even deeper than that, down in the core of my being, there is an understanding. It was there the whole time. There has been no change and there will never be. I can have this in my life forever, and that is my balm of Gilead. I will not be able to stop seeking or dreaming of my inspiration. I feel like Dante or Petrarch, and can understand clearly their anguish and despair. I do hope it becomes possible for me to feel this way to another who reciprocates equally, but I do not expect so. I love deep and hard and intensely, and I've turned away from the one who loves hard in return. I'm rambling on here, not sure where this will all take me... But I feel like my stagnation is my own and no one elses... If my domestic life wasn't so horrid, I may be open to a reconciliation, but I know it'll only lead to heartache and pain... I love you, Ael... I just wish I could show you how much...

Posted via m.livejournal.com.


surprised and humbled at the same time

There are two ways to view oneself: how you view yourself and how others view you. For example, most people do not see themselves as attractive, but others do. This is a physical attribute that is normally what is discussed when asked how others view one. Recently, for me, it has been complimentary of my personality traits rather than my physical appearance. This has been truly humbling for me, as I did not expect such things to matter more than what I look like. In a recent conversation with a friend of mine, I asked if I impressed him*, to which he replied, "Yes". This, of course, asked me to describe how I impressed him. The answer was this: "You have a lot of integrity". This absolutely left me with no words. It was an answer I was not expecting. Recently, I have also been told that I am loyal, trustworthy, honest, and a strong woman. On the shallow, physical front, I have been told that I look anywhere from 16-22 years old. I have grown a lot in many ways since I first started this online journal, back when I was 17. I am really grateful of the friends that have stuck by me for most of that time and realized what a great person I was and encouraged me to be so. It's truly rare to find people of such caliber in this world today and I am so happy that, not only have I found some, they are my friends. Thank you.

*using the standard pronoun, not disclosing gender of person, or persons, for reasons of anonymity. While, yes, I am quoting from a conversation, or various conversations, it is because of how it made me feel, and not to shine the spotlight on any one person.



Being 30 brings fearlessness. Not sure how else to explain that. It feels like things I would have, in the past, maybe shirked from, I am now interested in doing. Not dangerous or life-threatening things, but just more adventurous things. Like maybe that roller coaster I wouldn't go on before, I want to try now. Not sure why this is happening... it could be like the hormones going off that want me to get pregnant. 30 is an interesting age, but it's not really anything to freak out about. One is an adult now. Live life to the fullest. These next few years I am going to go out and live and do wonderful amazing things.


So whatever was in the news last week, has been replaced by pictures of cats. The only news stories that still matter are ones the media keeps reporting on. One-off stories are gone and no one remembers or cares. Old news.

Is there a positive outlook to having our world turn into a mixture of 1984 and Idiocracy? Sometimes, yes. People are so surrounded by media and screens that not all news is absorbed or remembered. Reporters may spend more time working a story than it lasts in the media. Companies are promoting the use of smartphone/tablet apps in order to keep up, but that's not fair. Those companies just want to track their users. Personalization is still not a great art, nor would be great if it was. The more personalized things get, the more creepy people find it. For some reason, some websites I visit think I'm a mom. Not really sure where this idea comes from, but I haven't gotten to the point where I'm telling said websites the info is wrong. The targeted ads will easier to ignore this way. Other targeted ads that I get are from websites I already have visited; if I didn't buy an item when I was on the site, the ads aren't going to change my mind. Hee hee. Silly personalized targeted ads.

Really not sure how this world is going to look over the next decade or two. It could be a utopia, a dystopia, or somewhere in between. I'm worried about the current generation of children whose parents are paying more attention to their electronic devices then their own children. Sherlock Holmes may actually thrive in this society, as many people have stopped being observant to their surroundings. There are teenagers that even get violently upset if asked politely to put their phones away. This is the land of the electronic babysitter/safety blanket. I grew up without all this nonsense, so I know how to navigate around it. I don't even update this as much as I could because I'm not reliant on the internet. I'm a mature adult, I know how to use tools I am given, and not abuse them. It's one thing to play with a new toy, it's another to not let it go.

What's going to happen in the future? What will happen if there's a magnetic pole shift or a large solar flare that upsets electricity? How many people know how to live without all this? The percentage, at least parts of the United States, has considerably dropped. Apple cannot save you from a world without electricity. Neither can Google. Both rely on power that may not be around as long as people think it will be.


Living on the edge

Not everyone may know this about me, but I actively avoid confrontation whenever possible. It's just not my thing. I can hold my own in conflict, if I have to, but I would rather have a peaceful existence amongst my peers. That being said, I tend to hover around the edge of social circles, never really going all the way inside. I'm not in the middle of the overlapping venn diagram, but I'm like on the corner of the overlap. Anyway, the good news about this, I'm not involved in all the drama that can come out of being too far in. The bad(?) news about this is, I am such a loyal and trustworthy friend that occasionally I become privy to conversations and/or knowledge that, in reality, is none of my business, but, in practicality, is worth my attention. I'm not really getting into details on such a public place explaining what I mean by this, but I am stating it publically nonetheless. I am aware of more than most people know, but I also am discreet about what knowledge I share and when. And that is what happens when people surf the edges.


Home Redecorating

While spouse is out of town, I'm changing up the flat a bit. I got some of those reusable wall sticker things and here is what I've done so far:

Above the TV in the main room

Bathroom Door

Closet Door

Above the bed

I am not finished yet, but I wanted to show what's done at this point.


Philadelphia Birthday Weekend

Dear Readers,
Due to the time we spent on the trip, I am putting the highlights of said trip into one entry. For those interested, do read on.

Our way in was very nice and we got here with minimum issue. Highlights on the hotel, which is the Hilton at Penn's Landing: free internet in the rooms, many channels on the TV, a bath mat in the tub, and a great view from the window.

There was a lot we saw the last time we were here, for those interested, here is where to read about that.
Read more...Collapse )
Apparently the truth is stranger than fiction. I have ripped up three pages of my history textbook already, because the truth is now becoming like failed answers on a history test. Here are four recent examples:

1. Where is Richard III?
Answer: Buried under a car park.

2. Who was Jack the Ripper?
Answer: An immigrant.

3. What caused the outbreak of the Black Death?
Answer: Gerbils.

4. What was the purpose of the pyramids?
Answer: They were an electric power source.


Birthday week begins

Tonight began the birthday celebrations that culminate with me being a score and a half.
Ate a lovely dinner with my father at Beautique. It had a plethora of flavours in each dish. Portions were small, but beautifully set out on the plates. For my gifts, I was given the Cast Recording of the revival of The Mystery of Edwin Drood. The liner notes are so hilarious, is just another reason to own music instead of digital copies. I also got a gold bracelet from my mother. Pics of it may follow. Undecided.

Anyway, it's down in the single digits for a while. Pretty crazy, but I've been okay. At least I live in a city that can handle it. My dad really loves me because he drove 45 minutes into the city to have a one hour dinner with me and then drove home. I guess it's a big deal I am a score and a half soon. *shrugs* Hasn't hit me yet.

BTW, officially changed my LJ name to clandestiny all other info is the same. Name is different. It's my name on Puzzle Pirates.


Ice in the Harbor

Yesterday, on my way into work on the ferry, the last ten minutes of the boat involved us sailing through ice.

I took some photos (dirty windows):

Ice 3
Ice 2
Ice 1

And here are some more from the SI Advance: http://www.silive.com/news/index.ssf/2015/02/photos_staten_island_ferry_sur.html


This is the time to see Hedwig

Spent the last few days watching John Cameron Mitchell perform as the title character of Hedwig and the Angry Inch with a leg brace covering most of his left leg. He has such great stamina and drive to perform. I am amazed he is doing what he is doing. Tonight and tomorrow are double shows back-to-back, 7pm and 10pm. I do hope he can do the turn around. Next week, he is taking a break and Michael C. Hall returns to do the role. For those that are Hed-heads or fans of JCM, this is the week to come see him perform. Hedwig in a leg brace is epic. The lines make sense, and there is such emotionality at different parts where before it wasn't there, or on a different wavelength. This is an amazing time to work this show and I feel honoured to be there everyday I go to work.
Ladies and Gentlemen,

This is flower with all its parts labeled:
flower parts

and this a female vagina with all its parts labeled:

What do these two have in common? They are both genital organs.
So when one receives flowers, the one who gives is saying 'Here are some severed flower genitals because I was thinking of seeing yours'.

Speaking of flowers, florist shops should be called Plant Funeral Parlors, because once flowers are removed from the soil, they are dying, like fish removed from water. They are not alive, and putting them in water only adds to their life span for so long. They're pretty much dead. So people are giving dead plant genitals to other people as a gesture of love because...why? Because they are pretty? Or because society dictates that it's okay to give dead things to each other as a gesture of romance?

Just know this, if someone gives me a plant, I better be able to eat it, otherwise, just don't bother. Thank you and enjoy your upcoming Catholic Saint's Day.


Bates Motel, TV Show, Review

Just started watching Season 1 on Bates Motel, the so-called prequel to Psycho I through IV. I didn't make it past the second episode. First of all, it's really slow and boring. The writing is terrible, with bad dialogue. The main problem, however, is consistency. If this is a prequel, why is it set in the 21st Century? And, if one is going to do that, why does Norman's teacher wear 1950s clothing? The cars also look really retro as well. Hannibal, the TV show, which is also made to be a prequel, although also set in the 21st Century, is consistent with that image and is not only believable in it, but enticing. This is just confusing. The dialogue isn't even consistent. A cop says, in the beginning of episode 2 that a person hasn't been seen for two days, and then later on in the episode, when Norman's mother mentions that the person has disappeared, the cop denies saying he said that earlier. I mean, really? I don't believe TV audiences are that stupid. Anyway, I am so over it. I gave it a shot. So unless someone tells me it gets better, I'm done watching it.

1 out of 5 stars.


Hiding in from the snow

A couple weeks ago, people were asking, "Where's the snow? It's pretty nice for winter."
Here is the snow folks. Outside. Right now.

I'm staying in today with a bunch of movies, video games, and myrddan.
Bought a bunch of candy, and we had our groceries come today, so we are set.

Books I will be reading this week:

Galateo's Rule's of Polite Behavior

Giordano Bruno by Ingrid D. Rowland

Maori Tattooing by Horatio Gordon Robley

Puritans at Play by Bruce Colin Daniels

Kitchen Grease

Learned this today... During WWII, US soldiers required glycerin to make explosives. So, they asked house wives to save their kitchen grease and give it to butchers. The butchers would then ship it to the army to make explosives.

See some posters:



The wonderfulness of a journal

One of the great things about having an online journal as long as I have (this journal has been online since 2002) is the ability to find dates of when things happened. We were trying to figure out when E went somewhere, and he couldn't remember. What I remembered, is that I went to visit him in that place and I wrote about it. So, I went and searched for it, and taa daa! I have the info! This is one of the reasons why keeping a journal or diary is so important. A digital one, for keyword searching makes it easy. So, thank you Livejournal for existing!!!

Jan. 12th, 2015

Spent the weekend reading The Supernatural Enhancements and spent this morning joining/re-joining birthday clubs! YAY!!! Free food/stuff during February. This is going to totally rock!

So, the new Memory Foam bed... feels like we sleep on a Care Bears' cloud. Very comfortable and nice and fun to lean against while watching the TV.

Here are the list of books I will be reading, so far, this week:

Devil in The White City

This Human Season

A Dark Dividing


The Uncommercial Traveler


bouncy bouncy

Not all things in my life are going to be posted on here, but what is currently going on is a slow revamping of the flat. We have finally entered the Memory Foam mattress world, and, once the sheets are delivered, shall be indulging in that luxury for quite some time. Also, this year marks me being in the world for three decades and, of course, we are taking a little mini adventure to celebrate. Plans will be finalized next month.

There also seems to be some sort of Livejournal rebirth or somesuch. People, besides me, notice how quiet it can be on here (unless you're Russian, in which case it's still quite huge) and so are posting more frequently. I do like this, and I'm going to do it as well, when life presents things worth posting. Next shall probably be pictures of the new bed... or something else... or whatever.


Jan. 2nd, 2015

First day back at work. Had a bit of the Melancholy today. Nothing a spouse cannot cure. A lot of things going on right now... will explain more in detail in a future post.

Also, edited my LJ settings so instead of current music, it now mentions the book I've been reading.


2015 already

Spending today listening to Old Time Radio shows like Lux Radio Theatre, Black Museum, and Inner Sanctum, as well as playing Puzzle Pirates. Slow day, just the way I like it.


Literary Questions

I was just wondering what my bookworm friends enjoy more: footnotes or endnotes? And, if it's endnotes, do you prefer the end of chapter endnotes or the end of the book endnotes? And why?
I like footnotes because I don't have to flip through pages looking for it and it's right there at the bottom of the page! It's like a little treat in an already entertaining book! Not sure why more people don't use them. I think the most famous example of the best footnotes would be Terry Pratchett. His footnotes are always topical, interesting, and humourous.

And as this year comes to a close, I do have one other question, does anyone want me to start posting what books I read? Kind of like my own personal reading list, for next year? Let me know.

2014 out.

Dec. 5th, 2014

The term "opt-out mom" offends me.
That is all

TV Commentary

I don't normally post things on here about what I watch on Television, but last night, I was just so happy with my choices. The stations available over the air via antenna (the free stations) have been showing many, many classic shows. Not all ones I watch or like, mind you, but still airing them nonetheless. From things like Perry Mason, Bonanza, Gunsmoke, Mr. Ed, Chips, Bewitched, Night Gallery, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, Macmillan and Wife, etc. My dad would be happy with these choices, I am sure. As would a lot of people familiar with the shows. There are too many to name here, so I'm not posting them all. There are some shows, however, that I have noticed missing, and would love to see aired: The Colgate Comedy Hour, Cosby Mysteries, Murder She Wrote, Naked Gun. Just happy to see these things aired among all the other shows on. It gives me more of a choice in what to watch.


Halloween is calling

From now, until the weekend, when one enters our flat, one will be greeted with this:

Upon entering the other room, more is revealed:
Spider Pumpkin 2

Finally, we decided to get a pumpkin for the season. Hopefully, next year we can get a bigger one carved out. We're growing up, folks. We want to celebrate the holidays like everyone else and lend a bit of the seasonal festivities to all our houseguests.

Spider Pumpkin
In front of the Museum of The American Indian, there is are a few descriptory panels with images on them. One of these has a hand-drawn image of what NYC and the surrounding area used to look like before the settlers came. It is a beautiful image, showing foliage, greenery, forest, and Manhattan Island's original size. Looking up from the image, one realizes just how far the city has grown since then. Sadly, most people don't even notice this. Most people are hanging out on the steps or nearby it, looking at glowing screens of mobile phones, tablets, laptops, etc. History is at one's fingertips, both literally and figuratively. If people stopped and looked around, they might realize that they are in one of the oldest places in Manhattan. Besides the Museum, which used to be the Custom House, the fence surrounding Bowling Green is the oldest iron fence in the entire city. It is older then the Revolutionary War. But, do people seem to care about this anymore? No-- SELFIE! I mean, really, you guys. You look the same as you did five minutes ago when you last took one.

Would Sherlock Holmes do better today, as his powers of perception would appear even greater than 100 years ago? Mayhaps. The point is, because of all this technology that many have chosen to make a priority, people are losing the ability to be observant to things around them. Impatience has worsened, and people are now hunting for outlets, not food. This is truly horrendous. And it mainly happens in major cities, by the by. On traveling to other places, my husband and I have noticed this epidemic is not as widespread. We look around restaurants when we eat and see no one, or very few people, on a glowing screen. This is not the case in NYC. It's horribly sad. Someone at work said something very poignant about last night to me, "Smartphones and browsing the internet take away from your reading time". That is true. I would much rather be curled up with a good book (made from paper, not pixels), instead of being on a phone, tablet, laptop, etc.

Technology is fine, when used properly, not obsessively. I used to have a phone that went online and I read the news on it, and a few other things. I thought that's what people wanted me to have. But, I would update my status, or send emails, or what-have-you. I was staying updated with people. Most of my friends, however, were not constant back. I learned a lesson from that: the internet can wait for you. I can be out all day and only get online once I get home, and no one is upset with me for that. Life is usually very momentary. The important issues will get through. My current mobile is mostly just a phone, with a texting keyboard. That's all I want. I have a laptop for the internet and I use it when I'm home. I feel much freer and less stressed. I can live my life and observe the fantastic world around me without a screen in the way. I wish more people would do that.

A march does not change the climate

Yesterday was the Climate March in midtown. Over 100,000 people were marching; all for different reasons. Now, the anti-fracking people are cool, and some of the other people were cool. However, I did see some hypocrites in the march. We are so stuck in this industrial economy that our markers, posterboard, and other protest signs contain petroleum and are made in factories that generate pollution. While I did not see the entire parade, I also did not see any home-made signs from Dryer Lint paper, nor did I see anything resembling home-made sustainable ink. Also, some of these people came to my theatre last night, bought bottled water (!) and did not recycle their cardboard.

I'm not trying to say that this parade/protest does not have good intentions, but what I am saying is that it is hard to create something like this using the convenient resources that exist in our society. Want to slow the effects of a negative climate change? Here are some suggestions:

1. Stop buying bottled water in areas where the local water is potable.
2. Make your own paper from dryer lint
3. Only buy sustainable products
4. Go back to landlines, cell phones and their parts contribute to a bad environment
5. Grow your own food and become a farmer

There are more, but these are some of the things that would help.

This may generate some hate mail, but, I am using the first amendment to discuss what I observed. Thank you.

Robin Williams...

His death has been all over the media and is on my Facebook wall. Normally, I don't really post things about dead celebrities, no matter how well I like them. However, I do wish to state that I did see him live once (thanks, Dad) and that I have seen almost all the movies he has been in. What this has gotten me to do is purchase What Dreams May Come, on VHS, one of the most appropriate films he starred in at this current time. I am sad, but after this film, I should be okay and able to watch the other films of his that I own. And just think, the other day myrddan and I were discussing Mrs. Doubtfire; albeit not because of Williams, but because of Harvey Fierstein.



me, happy
A Nonny Moose

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